|Image courtesy of reasonstobefit.tumblr.com|
In all my years of therapy, I know hiding isn’t dealing, it’s avoiding. It’s making something worse instead of making it better. It’s taking a grain of sand and turning it into a beach. I can’t keep pushing it aside, avoiding it. Not only does it not help but I am much worse off than I was before. I now know that in order to heal the emotional pain, I’m going to have to feel a lot of physical pain.
It’s that physical pain that heals. It’s that pain the gathers all those grains of sand. That pain is the lightning that turns the sand into a beautiful glass sculpture. I hurt anyway, so why can’t I change the way I hurt. Now is the time to take on a whole different kind of hurt. The hurt of screaming muscles, growing stronger. The hurt of a heart beating fast and hard, growing stronger. The hurt of physical exhaustion because I did the absolute best I could do for thirty minutes on the elliptical’s lowest setting. And that is a hurt I will truly welcome.
"Because if I’m going to hurt I’d rather it be from building myself up rather than tearing myself down."